Monday, April 25, 2011

English Words and the Asterix

Sunday, April 24, 2011

The Asterixfication of the explicit English language

By Mike Smith

24th of April 2011

Do you know why I am against censorship? …because when you take away the right to say FUCK, you also take away the right to say, FUCK THE ANC GOVERNMENT!

Now there are some blogs and some people who believe that one should have tact. That one should not lower oneself to the levels of the ANC Marxist terrorist scum that one should still attempt to convey a civilized message against an uncivilized enemy.

Problem is that Censorship and Political Correctness has almost become the same thing. Words such as “Kaffir”, “Nigger”, “Honkey”, “Coolie”, “Charra”, “Mlungu” (white froth or scum from the sea) and “Hotnot” have become socially unacceptable terms and Newspapers, magazines and online forums have banned such words in order to maintain a level of respectability and hold the moral high ground.

Does it help or compound the problem…not that it is a problem at all?

See, people are quite ingenious. Like the Hydra in Greek mythology, when you chop off one head, another two grow in its place. Banning such words just gives rise to ten others.

The word “Negro” is replaced by “Kneegrow”, the word “Kaffir” is replaced by “K@ffir”, “K4”, “Simian Bi-ped”, “Marmite Monster” or a string of other words. Swear words are also changed such as “Fuck the ANC” being replaced by “PHUQ the ANC”

In the past swear words in letters to the media used to be dumped immediately, yet nowadays it is allowed if you use the asterix symbol (*).

Instead of saying the real words, it is now left to the imagination of the reader who concludes whatever he wants. For example, nowadays one can leave a comment on the online forum of the Sowetan in the line of, “ F*ck Malema. He is a C*nt and a real K4 D**S. All he does is talk K@k. Etc and everyone will understand the correct meaning.

It is just a matter of time before the Asterix will claim its rightful place in the English dictionary.

But the use of such symbols could lead to real confusion…let me use another example…

Winnie Mandela gets knocked over by a 4x4 and goes to a useless K4 hospital where one of her favorite Cuban doctors is on watch at the trauma section. First thing he does is feeling her “Four letter word”.

What “Four letter word” you ask? Well here is a clue… it starts with a “P” and ends with an “S”…OK…you still give up?

Here is another clue…the second letter is an “O”….So far we thus have that the Cuban Doctor felt her “PO*S”…

Well you all have such filthy minds, because I was thinking of the Afrikaans word, “Pols” (Pulse). Start thinking outside of the (black) box you perverts.

Nevertheless, this kind of “Asterix Censorship” is fully phuqing up the English language, especially when a K4 gets hold of it. Point in case is ANC Youth League spokesman Floyd Shivambu…

IOL reporter Carien du Plessis was the brunt of his Asterixes (or is that Asterixae?)…This LWB felt so offended by his Asterixae that she went and charged him for “Hate speech” in the Equality Court”.

Shivambu is accused of hate speech for allegedly calling du Plessis “stupid” and a “white bi***” in text messages. Apparently being called “Stupid” did not bother her…it was the asterixae…

He further says “bi***” is not part of his vocabulary.

Not surprisingly. Spelling beyond two letters in an English word is not exactly the forte of undereducated ANC idiots such as Shivambu. I mean…English is a sophisticated language…not every bush K4’s thing.

In typical K@ffir fashion, ShivamPo*s denies everything. He never sent anything. He can’t remember. He just have to claim he was drunk at the time, someone took his phone and someone else sent all the messages from his cell phone.

He reckons, “I know I did not send the text message using those references because some of the words she alleges were sent from my phone are not part of my vocabulary, in particular the word 'bi***'.”

I did not know “Bi***” was a word in anyway. Ja, swaer…the Tokoloshe sent those messages.

Meanwhile, Afrikaner Girl with an Apartheid guilt complex, Carien du Plessis referred all queries to her (black) lawyer Okyerebea Ampofo-Anti (Nigerian?), who said her client declined to comment on the matter.

It appears as if all media institutions nowadays have black lawyers. Having a black lawyer apparently proves that you were legitimately criticizing the ANC and that you are not a “Racist K4 hater” such as Carien du Plessis…who is simply a “LWB”.

This Politically Correct absurdity is actually not bad. It creates jobs, because now we need more useless lawyers, linguists and other A**h*les to write up a list and definition of all the Asterix infested words in the English dictionary and crap such as LOL and ROTFLMAO.

Makes one almost want to say STFU, GTFO and GFY, 

No comments:

Post a Comment